4: Song Lyrics/ Omegle

   I haven't made a post in nine days, so here we go. Lol. Normally, I'd quickly be posting post as fast as a fat kid would eat a triple-layered chocolate cake topped with cupcakes but the lack of a computer. So, I guess I'll have to make do with my shitty Android tablet that has definitely seen better days. And it also means that there will be no pictures for this post. D:)

  Recently, I've become obsess with Counting Stars by OneRepublic. Now, if you're like me, a chronic Youtuber, than you sometimes look for covers of other people singing your fave tunes. I'm pretty vicious when it comes to cover makers. If you're gonna sing my favorite song, then you better sing it as though you fucking life depends on it! Otherwise, you'll be receiving a very angry comment on you channel!

   Why yes, I am an asshole. I've learned to accept that flaw in my character.

   I've also have taken a keen interest in Zombie by the Cranberries, Lights and Camera by Yuna (actually, a little sad), Until it Hurts by Francisca Hall, and Am I Wrong by Niko and Vinz. That last song I can actually relate to.

   I honestly suggest you guys listen to at least one of them to get the rest of this post.

   Song lyrics; people say that they're important. They make up the song. No, they MAKE the song. Personally, I've never followed this belief as seeing I'm also a fan of Celtic, which may I inform you, rarely has lyrics. Its just fine.

   So, taking this igneous advice, I tried listening to each of these songs' hidden meanings/messages. Zombie has begun to sound more like the thoughts of a person  who's in a mental asylum in the 1600's. Lights and Camera is sounding to me like the singer is trying to musically persuade you to  change yourself for the benefits of others. Also, she sounds as though she's trying to keep getting your hopes up, only to have them crash back to Earth at the speed of mach 1000.
 
    Thanks a fucking lot, Yuna. I really appreciate it.

   Until it Hurts actually sounds like beastiality if you listen close enough. I mean, seriously? (Speaking of, was Beauty and the Beast actually beastiality at one point?) Am I Wrong sounds like he's paranoid about whether or not he's doing about it molesting little ghost who look like children. You sicko.

   Yes, I did totally bash all of these songs but that is in no way going to stop me from listening to them on repeat until my eardrums burst. Fun.

   Yesterday, I decided to stupidly get on Omelge and here were the questions that were asked by total, complete strangers:

What if your girlfriend was a cute fifteen year old girl who was a classy, proper lady. Always brought her fedora around...

Stranger  1: If only.

If there was a mini human girl, say about five inches tall, would you be tempted to eat her?

   Stranger 2: I'd fuck her then eat her.

I bought a fucking camel and now my dad's pissed. We live in the city. Can I make use of it somehow? I don't wanna send him back. I call him Humpday and my neighbors already love him.

   Stranger 2: Dumbass. -_-

My dad just bought me my first trophy. I'm so excited!!! It says Daddy's Superstar on it! 

   Stranger 1:  OMG. I wish my dad bought me trophies. :/ Too busy cheating on my mom. Damn.

   Stranger 2:  I have nothing to say here... My dad just gives me chocolate.

What if you woke up and saw that you were a ghost hovering over your own body?

   Stranger 2: I'd scream that this was awesome and then put my ghost dick in my body's mouth. And hope it didn't choke.

Do you hate girls?

   Stranger 1: No!

   Stranger 2: I cum in girl.

   Stranger 1: There are some grammatical errors in that sentence. Would you like to try again?

And yeah, those were some of my experiences on Omegle... Later I asked some of the questions. :3

~M

3: Hugs/Hot Dogs

   

  Who invented hugs? I mean, the first hug must have been so tremendously awkward.

   "What are you doing...? Why are you holding me?"

   "Shh, just trust me."

   Like, who thought it'd be a great idea to invade someone's personal bubble to be translated as a sign of affection? If you love someone, you'd want to make them feel free, not squished and awkward against your starch, rough, agitating Polo shirt. Ew.

   And along with hugs, claustrophobia was invented. -_-

   I don't think people realize what they're doing when they eat a hot dog. There is definitely a reason why some people don't eat pork...

   My odd mother thought it'd be a good idea to show me a factory farm video. For those of you sad, deprived-of-knowledge people out there who do not know what a factory farm video is, let me tell you.

   It is when someone records how a specific product is made, from the slaughtering of the animal to the packaging of the product into the plastic and shipped off to the stores of America. (Or wherever you happen to reside. c;)

  My mother showed me how hot dogs were made and LET ME TELL YOU. It is disgusting! I'm not going to get into the gory details because I want my sandwich to stay in my stomach but, they don't take anything out before they grind up the pig. They leave the eyes, the hooves, the tiny little itty bitty hairs. EVERYTHING. They don't even take out the probably pee-filled bladder. You're eating bones!

   And wanna know what makes it worse? Pig are like garbage disposals. They eat anything from poop to trash. You're basically eating a disease in a bun. Just.. ew.

  Which is why promptly after watching that video, I became a vegetarian for five months. But then Red Lobster called my name and I was a goner. But I still stay far, FAR away from hotdogs.

*shiver*

~My

2: Cinderella's Shoes/Foot Sweat

   So. Everybody's always asking, "If Cinderella's show fit so perfectly, why did it fall off?"

   Well maybe Cinderella had sweaty feet? I really wished that Disney would stop making these girls out as if they were the perfect beings ever. I'm sure Cinderella or Belle, or someone in there burped or shat on themselves at least once. But anyway, how about you try running in glass heels and not have one slip off due to a sweaty foot? I'm telling you, if we didn't have socks, we'd probably be doomed. I for one am a terrible runner and have recieved many low grades due to my non-participation in PE. It also didn't help that I mouthed off regularly to Mr. Meyers, the eighth grade gym teacher. :/ But hey, I'm 15. I've got time to improve.

  Also, who decided that the word "socks" should be spelled cks instead of an x. You're trying to make the English language as easy as possible, why not just make it an x? Gawsh. You're taking out three extra letters that are completely unneccesary. Along with the other words that end with those letters.

  Another question people commonly ask: "Do gangsters know that if they pull their pants up, they can run from the police faster?" 

   Yes, smartass. I am sure they're well aware of that fact. They're not idiots despite what most people believe.  What if they just bought some new jockstrap that they wanna show around? Maybe they think that if the policemen who see their underwear are impressed, they can get some time off in the big house. Lol. Hell, what if they're expensive tidy whities? If I bought some expensive underwear, I wouldn't even consider drooping. I'd just go pantsless. I swear to God I would. 

   So yeah, that's what was on my mind a few mintues ago. c;

~My

   

   

   

1: The World of Blogging/ Embarassing Moments

   Let me start off by saying this. I hate awkward beginnings. So, I'm going to start this blog off as if I've been doing it for years. That way, it won't get awkward and everybody's just fidgeting and listening to crickets chirp. M'k? Kay.

   Everyone has that moment at school where the do something completely embarassing and they end up wishing that the floor could suck them under or that some crazy chainsaw-weilding man will come out of nowhere and kill them. Actually, I know a guy who could help you out with that...

   Mine, for example was in sixth grade. I was in anger managemnt class and everyone was seated in a tight, neat circle. I glanced down and noticed that the laces to my Chucks were undone. (And for the record, I'd sell my firstborn for all the Chucks in the world.) I wasn't feeling well at the time. My stomach was making odd, gurgling noises that I tried to conceal by folding my arms. So, when I bent down over my knees to tie the laces, the loudest fart known on the planet escaped my bum whole and had my cheeks exploding with blush blood like it was the fourth of July. That day I made it known that a mixed person could blush.

   Everybody, and I mean everybody, was staring and meanwhile I was squeezing my eyes shut and praying inside my head for God to smite me on the spot. The only good thing that came out of that day was that the gargling in my stomach stopped and I could breathe again without feeling like an earthquake was shaking my intestines around. But it honestly didn't matter because a whole new feeling of discomfort had settled into my stomach and it didn't leave for a whole forty-eight hours. UTTER EMBARRASMENT!!!!

   So, here's my question, in case you were wondering where I was headed with this. Why do we have these moments? Is it all apart of growing up? First your voice changes, then mounds of fat began to grow on your chest that harmonol boys become attracted to and then you begin the process of embaressmant? Or is it just God's simple way of saying hey, hot stuff, cool it? Or maybe, a witch a long time ago cursed every human ever born to suffer one embarassing moment to last a lifetime. If that's the case I would love to cleave that witch in half and light her insides on fire because I've definitely had my fair share of embaressing moments.

   So yeah. That's all I have for today. c; Later.

~My

 
(P.S. Sorry for the random monstrosity that is this blog thus far. I promise I'll get better as time goes on. )